In Memory of my Sweet Lolo

Alejandro Dumas Delano Poblete Manalo

❤ 🌷 my Lolo 🌷 ❤

January 8, 1947 – April 9, 2022

My Lolo holds a special place in my heart. Through processing my grief with the passing of my Lolo, I was surprised at how angry I felt towards dementia. My Lolo lived with dementia for the past 9 years. I was angry for all those years that he couldn’t garden, couldn’t plant all his flowers, stopped taking photos, was not able to continue recording his CDs or do the projects that brought him joy and purpose. I was angry for the healing in my family that couldn’t happen because my Lolo was not cognitively able to have those conversations.

As I open up to acceptance and appreciation, Ecclesiastes is ringing in my mind. There is a season and a time for everything under the heavens, and God is sovereign through it all. Dementia was so challenging AND I got to learn a new side of my Lolo. I got to learn how to be present in the moment and appreciate each day.

I am shaped by my Lolo. The ways I find joy in singing, taking photos on film cameras, working on projects, eating crunchy foods, gardening, being creative, my work ethic and bent towards perfectionism, stopping to appreciate the flowers, saving everything because it might come in handy later, and being present with people are all qualities I got from my Lolo. Who he was before his dementia and with his dementia. And honestly, I could use a little more of his boldness and care free nature as he belted out into song whenever he had an audience.

There are so many things that I could say and memories I want to share, but for now, I will leave it as this. Salamat po Lolo for teaching me how to see all things beautiful and lovely. I love you forever.

~My first film camera was from my Lolo. I took all of these photos of my Lolo on film between 2016-2022. I appreciate them as much as I appreciate all the photos Lolo took of us growing up.~

Winter Warmth

My two glowing babes who light up my life. I am so grateful for the support and joy De’Ana and Tressa graciously share. From middle school, to middle-twenties, we are rocking it. I love how we can talk about God, relationships, systemic issues, family, politics, and the future for HOURS ⚘

I am looking forward to my plan working and De’Ana and Tressa will move back to Bremerton. Then we will be able to fulfill our pregnancy pact and all do yoga with big baby bellies together ⚘

Sending golden hour sunshine to you ⚘

Nate & Lexie Engagement 2021

Nate, Lexie, and I drove down to the infamous Vance Creek Bridge. The road to get there winds along the Salish Sea, which connects to a river at the southern end of the Hood Canal. The road meanders through farmland before taking a turn onto a working forest road. Once we parked, we jumped out and started our journey up the steep trucker routes through the trees.

Honestly, I want to write something creative and thoughtful, but I do not have the energy to put my thoughts into words at the moment. I do know that Nate and Lexie are two people in love with each other standing on a strong foundation of faith in Jesus. Falling in love, finding your person, and commitment are all things that I still don’t understand but something I do know is that Nate and Lexie work together. Their caring, chill, down to earth attitudes mesh together in a beautiful way and I am grateful to see their love for each other and God as well as service to others continue to grow and flourish.

Holding On

I am tearing up thinking of when my Lolo would sing this song. Dementia has changed so much of how my Lolo interacts with the world. In a lot of ways, he became softer, more goofy. His priorities became distilled to being with people, sharing joy through singing, and enjoying life (through eating and sleeping haha).

Lately, he has shifted again and is experiencing a lot of paranoia, confusion, and agitation. It is really sad to see him stuck in a scary storyline and I’m sure exhausting for my Lola and Uncle David who so patiently care for him every second of the day.

My Lolo was diagnosed with Dementia 8 years ago. I am so thankful for my Lola being such an amazing human through all of this. She holds onto the good and very gracefully flows with the changes that my Lolo goes through. I am thankful that we have had 8 years of yes challenges but an abundance of beautiful moments. I am hoping that my Lolo can get help and does not have to continue in the cycle he is stuck in now.

I am reminded to hold on. To the good, the bad, the relationships, the humanity, and connecting with myself (so I can process my emotions). What a wonderful world we live in, where nothing is certain and the only moment we have is the one right now.

*~2019 Recap~*

2019 has zipped by and has been full of joy! Being in my young adult years, there are many transitions and looming life decisions that can cause uneasiness but luckily, I have been feeling more able to trust in the process of life and have peace, knowing that everything will work out in God’s timing and provision.

In my last year at the Evergreen State College, I had fun working as Speedy the Geoduck (our mascot). A highlight was getting to unicycle while in my costume at a basketball game! I was in a program titled “The Spanish-Speaking World” where we studied the history of Central and Latin America as well as learned Spanish and ethnography. In April, I got to study abroad with half my class in Mérida, México. I lived with the most sweet and energetic host family and got to room with one of my classmates! 

Living in Mérida was amazing. There is an endless amount of things that I could say but I will mention a few. First, we were there from April to June, which is the hot season, so it was almost 100 degrees everyday. One day, I had to rush to get to my volunteer internship at Edúcate (an academic support program for low-income youth) so I was jogging to the bus stop in 105 degree heat, wearing jeans! That was too hot!! My body did thrived with the daily detox from sweating out my toxins and all the vitamin D from the sun I was taking in. Plus, whenever I got too hot, I ate ice cream to cool down so I was living in luxury! Also, the few times it rained were glorious – I danced in the street and got splashed by cars going through ginormous puddles in the flooded roads. 

We went on three excursions to different areas of the Yucatán peninsula as a class. We visited organizations that work to empower Indigenous knowledge and voices, sustainability, environmental and economic justice, education, and community activism. In one field trip, we went on a tour of a local permaculture farm and right as we stepped out of the van we got to witness a mama cow giving birth! Then, we learned about the native melipona bees that produce honey rich with medicinal properties and don’t have stingers. These bees are vulnerable to the types of bees brought over when México was colonized, but a different native species of bees that also don’t have stingers, will fight the colonizer bees on behalf of the melipona bees. Within the community organizations we saw, there was the same type of interconnectedness and joining together to support indigenous voices, ways of life, and revitalization of culture.

When I got back to the states in June, I graduated from Evergreen State College with a Bachelor’s in Arts focused in Ethnic Studies and Education. I am so grateful for my time at Evergreen! I moved back to my hometown of Bremerton, WA, which is located on the ancestral and current lands of the Suquamish, Duwamish, Kalallam, and Twana/Skokomish peoples, into my Lola and Lolo’s (grandparents) house and started an amazing summer job. I got to be a camp counselor for an outdoor education camp, put on by the Great Peninsula Conservancy, for middle schoolers coming from marginalized backgrounds. Every Tuesday and Thursday I would pick the students up in a Kitsap Transit van and we would go to a location in Kitsap county to explore and learn about our community, history, and ecology. My most special day was on the lowest tide of the year, we went down and explored the beach. All across the shore, the students squealed with delight and shouted for me to come see what they had found! It was so fun to see their tough exteriors fall away and their childlike wonder come out. My students were such a blessing!

Currently, I am a nanny to the best 5 and 2 year old on my block. We enjoy going to the park, doing crafts, pretending we are monsters, and reading books. It is so fun to watch them grow and experience the wonders of the world. Just last week, we got soaked from head to toe splashing in the rain puddles, something I would not decide to do on my own, but laughed a lot in the freedom of being in the moment. I am also an AVID tutor in the high school and middle school. I work with small groups of students to build college and career ready skills like collaboration, organization, and practice working through challenges in their content material.

I was accepted to the Secondary Master’s in Teaching program at the University of Washington! I now have to decide between that program (which starts in April) and a graduate program in outdoor education at IslandWood in Bainbridge Island, WA (which starts in August). Please pray for wisdom in choosing the right next step!

One awesome thing this year has been receiving flight benefits from my Uncle David who is a flight attendant. This means I can fly super cheap on standby. I have gotten to connect with my Great Aunt Bette in Florida, visit friends in Chicago, Colorado, and different parts of California. I have also been having fun making silly magnets out of clay. They are being sold in my local co-op, which I love! I enjoy getting to walk around and ride my unicycle everywhere, going to workout classes at the YMCA, and all the yummy food places in Bremerton. I am soaking up the solace of this in between school time in my life.

I hope to start the tradition of writing a recap every year and then, when I am an old-timer, I can look back over the years as a way to record the history of my life and share those stories with others. I am so thankful for the support and love I have from my family, friends, and community. Thank you all for the love, laughs, and time spent together this past year! I am excited to journey together this next year. Happy 2020!

 

Peace and Joy,

Breanne ☺

 

P.S. The photo of me was taken by my friend Rebekah on the day of my graduation party!

Happy 71 Birthday, Lola!

Lola and Breanne

Some fun facts about my Lola are:

~My Lola is 50 years older than me.

~I didn’t know old people could swim until the summer after 5th grade when we were in Hawai’i and my Lola became a seal and gracefully broke through the waves.

~My Lola loves to travel and will often make plans then text where her and my Lolo are going when they get on the train or to the airport.

~When my Lola was just out of high school she was in an apprenticeship to become an auto mechanic. She also worked to put wire that is smaller than a hair strand through circles that are around the size of the eye of a needle which got put into computers!

~My Lola is one of the most generous people I know and always loves to take people out to meals, have people stay in her house, and give gifts to people.

I love you Lola and hope you are having a great time on your birthday travels (: